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presents!

For Michelle & Effy:



For Chris:



Flashing champagne glass!

For Dwayne:



~voicemail~

"Um... hi, I guess. It's Natalie. Um... leave a message? I guess? Or don't. No one really wants to talk to a crazy person. Well. Not crazy yet. But potentially crazy. You don't even want to risk it. Trust me. I might be out getting fucked up. Or having a breakdown in the store. Or trying to kill myself, or ... Shit. Now I really do sound--

BEEP."

Tags:

How fucked up I can be

She wasn't there. And this time, neither was he.

Another fucking recital and neither of them showed. Not even Dad, and if he's not there... I don't know why I expect her to show up. I don't know why I expect everything to be normal. Hell... I wouldn't know normal if it bit me in the ass. I try to be so fucking perfect, so I won't be like them. Like her. Perfect perfect perfect... Fuck. 

I took her pills. All of them. She doesn't even know. I don't know what I swallowed. Green, red, yellow, blue... They all just blended together.

I'm way more fucked up than I've ever been on pot. I can't feel my legs. I can't feel anything.

I went with Henry to some club. Jusr dancing, dancing til I couldn't fucking breathe. I don't know what happened after that. Too much of a blur of Vicodin or Zoloft or some shit Tchicovsky wouldn't know how to pronounce but my mother can and I guess it's good I can't feel.

If I can't feel I can't go crazy. If I can't feel, watching my mother destroy herself won't destroy me.

Profile

the invisible girl
daughterofair
Natalie Goodman

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